Waking up grumpy
This morning I woke up in a grumpy mood.
Sadness and weariness about Covid-19.
Discomfort because I disappointed someone.
Grief as I notice the 3 month anniversary of a dear friend who passed.
Uncertainty + anxiety about all the "in between."
PMS - physical discomfort, emotional, lack of motivation, etc.
Frustration + a feeling of powerlessness while making summer plans.
Plenty of reasons to wake up grumpy. Yet, I don't want to be a grump ALL day. How do I move from a place of negativity, powerlessness and blah?
This is how I addressed it...
1. Notice what I'm feeling and name it - I'm grumpy. I considered leaving a message for a friend, but decided not to dump my grump on someone else. Instead, I rolled over (figuratively) into God's lap and dumped it on Him. It won't burden him or change his outlook on the day.
2. Acknowledged the grump - no denial, repression or rejection. With kindness, like a friend, I asked myself why I was feeling grumpy. I wrote it all down without judgement. It's a lot. No wonder I feel grumpy. I accepted my humanity. I wrapped it up by writing "breathe, inhale/exhale, it's okay, I'm okay, it's not an emergency." Reading the words + breathing was a release.
3. Be grateful - Gratitude is a great response to grumpiness. I added 20 things to my gratitude journal. I've kept a numbered list in a journal since January 2014. Today I added #2286-2305. I made it easy by looking around for things to write down (low mental exertion) - chap-stick, Trader Joe's plants, candles, birds chirping, sunshine, rain, fresh cut flowers and hand lotion.
4. Positive Input. I LOVE the Lectio 365 app. Check it out. It's free. I listened and let it soak into my soul. Release the grump, receive the good.
5. I plan to take it easy today. Be gentle with myself. Handle what needs to be done, but not a bunch of extras. Keep it simple.
6. Repeat as necessary. I may need to return to these ideas in an hour, tomorrow, or every day for awhile. That's okay. At least I have tools.
Nothing has changed about the circumstances that make me grumpy. Yet, my perspective has shifted a little and I'm in a better posture to handle the day.
*** This worked - for a solid 5 hours. Then, the sadness + grumpy emotions knocked me down again. I asked for space to be alone, grabbed two devotional books, and a handful of chocolate (*PMS). Good in, grump out. Be gentle and kind. Accept my humanity. It's hard, but I will get through it. This too shall pass.
If you feel grumpy today, you aren't alone. Sending you a virtual hug, ideas that work for me, and cheering you on. I'm also adding you to my gratitude list.
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